. . . for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.
Matthew 12:34

One of the most important requisites for both the government of self and home is the control of the voice. The voice is the expression of the condition of the mind and heart. The heat, temper, spirit of the mind and heart naturally comes out in the tones of the voice. Anger, excitement, resentment, dictation, censoriousness, express themselves in a strong, harsh voice. Passion of every kind puts itself into the tones of the voice, not to control others, but to kindle itself in their minds. Let a gust of wind come into a house through an open door and how the doors slam, the curtains rattle, the papers careen about the room, and general confusion is stirred up. So it is when a gusty, passionate voice comes in at our open ears. It wakes up bedlam inside of us in a minute. It does not subdue but arouse us. It does not govern but excites us. It does not help us to govern ourselves, but puts self-government into rebellion. The very first lesson in self-government and home government is in the control of the voice. It seems we cannot control our passions so easy as we can our hands. We need not strike because we are angry. We need not throw stones or shoot because ill-will is up within us. We need not burn, destroy, and kill because we hate somebody. We can keep our hands from doing mischief even when we cannot keep our anger down. We can control the outward act, even when rage burns within us. This we are expected to do. The Lord requires it; law requires it; decency requires it; self-respect requires it. So we can control our tongues easier than we can our passions. They are outward members like our hands. A blow with the tongue is an outward thing just like a blow with the hand. A blow with the tongue is just as wicked and irritating and irrational as a blow with the hand; and yet many people let their tongues run loose in the family and strike fore and aft without restraint, and then wonder why there is no government in their homes. Many a man will strike his wife with his tongue, blow after blow, when he would not strike her with his hand. And sometimes wives are tongue-strikers, who do not strike with their hands. This unruly member, the tongue, is the first one in the family to put under control. There is no government where the tongue is ungoverned. The poor government of many families is due to the striking freedom given to the tongues. There must be a new law of home; or the old law reenacted, which allows the Lord to bridle the tongue and guide it by the reigns of His Word, in all such Christian homes.

This voice government must begin with the parents if they would be governors of home. Children who hear their parents scold and fret at each other, who hear rebuke and censure, harsh tones and loud faultfindings in them, will not get the obedient spirit, or the harmonious disposition, from the atmosphere of their homes. On the contrary, they will catch the words and tones of harshness and the spirit of disobedience as quickly as they would the measles if exposed to them. Oh, the voice, the voice, the voice, what an instrument of harmony or discord it is in the home! It is a harp filling all the air with melody, or a "sounding brass" breaking the ears with clanging blows. Which shall it be? Is the question for parents to settle. Which shall it be? Is the question which settles the character of the home government. Which shall it be? Is the question which determines largely the spirit of the children. Sour, complaining, quarrelsome dispositions are not made in the home atmosphere which is always musical with gentle voices. Home-ruining willfulness and bellicose rebellion do not originate or thrive in the presence of voices toned always with intelligent affectionateness. Keep the voices keyed to the mellow sweetness of home harmony and love, and there will always be a government that will be beneficial and an influence that will be uplifting in the home. This is a matter that is so within everyone's control that it is the place to begin and to continue the home discipline. The passions, tastes, differences, dispositions are so deep and inward and powerful that none of us are able altogether to control them on our own. We must have Jesus Christ living in and through us so we may conquer these tares of the flesh. In our inmost souls we are often less and worse than we would prefer to be. Our good ideals are often set in sharp contrast with our bad realities. We desire to be so much better than we are that we often blush at our deficiencies. But the words we speak, the tones in which we utter them, the voice-power we give them, are so outward that we can control them with Christ's help. We need not rage in speech. We need not "grate harsh discord" in our tones. We need not thunder in power of voice. We need not stir up anger nor drive the home spirit weeping away by our manner of speech. This is ours to manage--ours to control--ours to shape, tone, modulate, through the grace and strength of Jesus Christ. Here at least, with God's help, we can master our tongue. As we may master the hand that it shall not strike, burn, nor kill, so, through Christ, we can master our speech that it shall not hurt, be cruel, coarse, or profane. Our tongues, lips, lungs are instruments to be used for God's glory. He has placed this in our control, it is our field of action, and we may do our work in it so as to not put us in torturing discord with our families, but in happy sympathy with what is best in them.

Words, words; who can tell their power for good or ill? How they go like bullets of fire into wounded spirits, or like notes of music to happy souls. They are the heart-hurters, the home-spoilers, the union-breakers. They make divorces, enmities, prodigals. They break in upon quiet homes like burglars and carry away its peace. They are often sharp like daggers and pierce to the very core of life. Again, they are blunt like slugs and bruise their way into the heart. Then again they are jagged and tear through the live flesh of sensibility and leave unhealing wounds. Fearful hurters are spiteful, poisoned words; bullets on the battlefields do far less mischief than words do in the homes of men. Go into troubled human homes where difference and dissension are parting hearts that have been one and the cruel pain of blighted hope and defeated life is being felt and trace the cause, and in most cases unweighed, unconjugal and unsympathetic words sowed the seed and nourished the bitter plant of trouble. Words with anger in them, with distrust, jealousy, pride, discouragement in them, what weights of woe they carry to closely-related souls.

Then on the other hand, words are the heart-makers, home-builders, marriage bonds between spirits which are all the world to each other. Laden with sunshine and fragrant with the aroma of flowers, how they come out of a Christian heart with good purposes, resolute friendships, and holy loves, to carry comfort and peace and joy to hearts that are encouraged by them. Words with honey in them are charged with peace and moral health, are "like apples of gold set in pictures of silver" which adorn our life with such grace that it seems almost divine. All the sweet poems that have been written on kind words have not told half their influence and power. We all know by experience how sweet to our ears and how soothing and agreeable to our hearts are the tones of a gentle voice. Then why do we not imitate them? Why do we not sweeten the tones of our own voices with the gentleness which we all love and which so becomes the Christian home and every one of it's members? Ah, we are too much under the sway of our flesh, too selfish, coarse, rude, irritable, willful. We forget that gentleness is a graceful garment on a strong man. Power is never so beautiful as when robed in sweetness. The heavy voice of a grand, strong man is never so captivating and regal as when it is controlled and enriched by tender emotions. Man's magisterial voice is wonderfully susceptible to this softened cadence, and the power there is in it. Oh, that men knew the power there is in their voices for everyday home uses--not in their thunder tones, not in their jarring coarseness, but in the subdued cadences of manly tenderness and goodwill. What woman is not charmed by such a manly voice? What child is not subdued and won by it? What human can resist its conquering supremacy? And woman's voice is made for the flutelike mellowness of voice power--made for the music of human speech,--made to fill the home with her grace and the world with Christian influence. The voices of children and youth when at their best, have in them the silver tones that are grateful to all ears, and the sweetness that makes home always a reminder of Heaven. Then why not have the home controlled by the Christian voice--the voice of authority in love--the voice of duty in kindness--the voice of wisdom in the serenity of patience and peace?

Here lies the discipline--the government of homes. The rod, the scepter, the authority are in the voice. Use them, oh, parents, in the low voices of Christ-like wisdom and love.